December 2019

 

Surprise! I was Wrong.

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

When I wrote the initial proposal for my book, it was called “The Queer Person’s Guide to Love, Monogamy and Open Relationships” and it addressed monogamy and open relationships in the LGBTQ community). After reading the proposal, my agent said, “You need to focus more…

This year: Do It Differently

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

Are you a “Happy Holidays!” or “Bah, Humbug!” person? For many of us, the holidays bring crazy-making expectations. We’re bombarded with media images encouraging us to buy stuff (with our credit cards, of course), go to parties and events (or be alone, which may feel…

How to Balance your Heart, Mind and Genitals

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

Romance. Sex. Intimacy. Hooking up. Hanging out. Do I have your attention? As men-who-love-men, we want all things from all men. We want hot sex, emotional intimacy, a great, loyal friend and a handy man who can help us fix our car/house/life. In short, we…

How to Feel Less Anxious

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in Columns

It’s pretty easy to feel anxious these days, especially with climate change, attacks on LGBTQ rights and a government led by someone as mentally unstable as Donald Trump. After suffering from panic attacks myself – and helping my clients with anxiety/worry/fears/ phobias – here are…

Are You Ready for Marriage?

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in Columns

Choosing a partner is one of most important decisions any of us will ever make. It determines the harmony – or lack of it – that we will experience in every area of our lives. Unfortunately, the statistics (based on predominantly heterosexual marriages) do not…

What is Community?

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

When Gay San Diego was for sale, I wondered “What will happen to the Gay San Diego community if the paper goes under?” Luckily, Terry Sidie bought the paper and it has been renamed/revitalized/ relaunched. It’s hard to keep a paper going in these online/social media-saturated…

Love, Sex and Grindr

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

This column originated in questions that I’ve gotten from my clients, such as: Is it true that too much Grindr or Scruff sex makes you numb? Does Grindr encourage sex addiction? My friend met his husband on Grindr: why can’t I? Has Scruff replaced dating…

90 Seconds

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in Columns

I used to hate science in high school. In my class of 68 people (Wellington High School class of 1971), our biology teacher was completely incompetent and our physics teacher gave you extra credit if you went to the high school wrestling matches (you guessed…

Cry. Laugh. Feel.

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in Columns

Many people tell me that I don’t look my age (66). When they ask me: “What’s your secret?” I can honestly say, “Feeling your feelings is crucial.” That doesn’t mean you have to express your feelings to or at another person (that creates drama, and is a…