lgbt

 

How to Have Safe Sex: Now

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

As things continue to “open up”, what about sex? When will that “open up”? I am not an epidemiologist, but I’ve been reading a lot of medical/science stuff relating to sex lately, in addition to hearing how my friends and clients are having sex now….

ALOR: Acceptable Levels of Risk

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

These days, a lot of my conversations with clients and friends include talking about acceptable levels of risk (aka, “ALOR”). As things open back up, what kinds of risk are you comfortable with? Are you comfortable going to a restaurant? A bar? A barber shop?…

The New Normal

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

In a pandemic, our old ideas about how life works no longer apply. We don’t know when or how this time of quarantining will end. Hell, we can’t even predict what will happen next week, so much is changing so fast. As a psychotherapist, it’s…

Power, Love & Presence

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

As young people, most of us start off feeling pretty powerful. We have the confidence, naiveté and energy of our twenties and are excited about all the sweet, untasted possibilities of life. In our thirties, we get our first taste of being older: we are…

Surprise! I was Wrong.

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

When I wrote the initial proposal for my book, it was called “The Queer Person’s Guide to Love, Monogamy and Open Relationships” and it addressed monogamy and open relationships in the LGBTQ community). After reading the proposal, my agent said, “You need to focus more…

This year: Do It Differently

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

Are you a “Happy Holidays!” or “Bah, Humbug!” person? For many of us, the holidays bring crazy-making expectations. We’re bombarded with media images encouraging us to buy stuff (with our credit cards, of course), go to parties and events (or be alone, which may feel…

How to Balance your Heart, Mind and Genitals

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

Romance. Sex. Intimacy. Hooking up. Hanging out. Do I have your attention? As men-who-love-men, we want all things from all men. We want hot sex, emotional intimacy, a great, loyal friend and a handy man who can help us fix our car/house/life. In short, we…

What is Community?

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

When Gay San Diego was for sale, I wondered “What will happen to the Gay San Diego community if the paper goes under?” Luckily, Terry Sidie bought the paper and it has been renamed/revitalized/ relaunched. It’s hard to keep a paper going in these online/social media-saturated…

Love, Sex and Grindr

Posted by Michael Dale Kimmel in lgbt

This column originated in questions that I’ve gotten from my clients, such as: Is it true that too much Grindr or Scruff sex makes you numb? Does Grindr encourage sex addiction? My friend met his husband on Grindr: why can’t I? Has Scruff replaced dating…