Michael Dale Kimmel – www.lifebeyondtherapy | Columns - Michael Dale Kimmel - www.lifebeyondtherapy
San Diego-based, California-licensed psychotherapist, assisting clients in achieving their goals and becoming the men and women they want to be.
San Diego Therapist, California-licensed psychotherapist,
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Slower is Better

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Are you afraid to slow down? Do you think only stupid people go slowly? You’re not alone. Why do we rush so much?  What do we think we’re achieving?  Is happiness basically a numbers game – whoever does the most stuff wins – or a matter of…

Is that all there is?

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For many of us, a major birthday (30, 40, 50 or 60) brings great hope for change. We expect things will be better.  However, just because we’re another year older, nothing really changes. As a psychotherapist, I notice that expecting things to get better – without…

Affirmations: Useful or New Age Nonsense?

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Dear Michael: I liked your recent meditation column.  Someone told me that they do “affirmations” to help them stay focused.  What are these “affirmations” and do you think they really help or are they just a bunch of new age fluff? Curious in Downtown     Dear…

Do I have adult Attention Deficit Disorder?

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Long ago and far away, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) and attention deficit disorder (ADD) were considered childhood disorders that somehow magically disappeared around adulthood. Welcome to reality: scores of recent studies have shown that ADD/ADHD is more common in adults than most health professionals…

Are you dating, hanging out or hooking up?

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Dating: the word sounds ancient, doesn’t it? Instead, we usually hear “hooking up”, a phrase that sounds pretty meaningless and shallow, or “hanging out”, a terribly vague description of spending time together. All of this leads me to ask the question: Is Dating Dead? Dating…

Why can’t I be happy and grateful?

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Dear Michael: I feel like such a fool. I have a great job, good health, a loving husband, great kid and a good group of loyal friends…but I still feel empty and miserable inside and find myself crying for no reason. What’s wrong with me? Why…

The power of humor

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Perhaps only God Himself/Herself is more important than humor.  Seriously. Psychological research has found that when people list the qualities they desire in a partner, a good sense of humor consistently shows up near the top.  For some of us, a good sense of humor is more…

Self-esteem

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Dear Michael: My friends encouraged me to write to you, but I don’t know if you can do much.  They say I have lousy self-esteem.   Maybe they’re right.  Whenever someone gives me a compliment, I think they’re after something and I don’t believe them.   Doesn’t everyone have…

Love or infatuation?

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Remember back in Junior High, when you had a “crush” on some hot guy or girl? How you could barely breathe when they were close to you? You couldn’t stop thinking of them. These “summer romances” weren’t expected to last for long. Indeed, they couldn’t,…

Stop hating yourself: the joys of getting older

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It seems like an epidemic: we’re all becoming older and feeling that we’re becoming more-and-more invisible. I get emails from mid-life men and women saying some version of: “I am physically aging much faster than I’d hoped. Who’s going to want me now?” Popular culture calls this…