I have lived alone many times, in many places, e.g.; Dayton, Ohio; Louisville, Kentucky; Paris, London, New York City and San Francisco. I have also lived with many other people (not simultaneously) in places like New Haven, Connecticut; Panorama City, California; Yonkers, New York; Bath;...
People use the term “intimacy” very loosely, but, what exactly is it? The meaning of intimacy varies from relationship to relationship. To me, it has to do with feeling a connection with another person. It requires empathy: the ability to stand in another person’s shoes. Intimacy is...
Sex is great right? Lots of fun. Easy, no problems. Always available when you want it. Your libido is strong and will do whatever you want whenever you want. You can have great sex several times a day with any number of hot men and/or...
I often ask clients: “What do you do with your anger?” Some people are surprised by that: they’ve never really thought about it. Let’s think about it now. Healthy anger is normal and okay; it’s not a bad thing and it doesn’t mean you’re out of control....
When clients ask me, “Why did you become a therapist?”, my usual response is: “If you knew my childhood history, you’d understand.” According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention, one in five Americans has been sexually molested as a child; one in four was...
Does your life feel too boring and predictable? Maybe you need to have an adventure: if you have a little time and a bit of money, that’s all you need. People think that you need to spend a lot of money to go away on...
It’s probably not what you think: I don’t have a problem with drinking. Before I stopped, I rarely had more than two drinks at any occasion, and I often didn’t drink anything alcoholic for a week or two. So why have I stopped then? Years’ ago,...
When you left your teenage years and entered your twenties, did you ever feel that you were falling apart? If so, you’re not alone. It’s also true for those of us in our thirties, forties and upwards. Most of us head into “grown-up” life with...
The longer I work as a psychotherapist, the more amazed I am at how we all – myself included – keep doing things that make us unhappy. Call it a pattern or a habit, whatever you call it, we keep repeating behaviors and thoughts that...
Some subjects are timeless, like love. Many self-help gurus say stuff like, “You can’t love anyone else if you don’t love yourself.” Sounds good, but, what does that mean? Loving yourself is a process, it doesn’t happen overnight. It progresses – in stops and starts –...